I'm writing this post on the very day that I had my first psychic intuitive reading - I don't know exactly when I'll share it, but I do know that I want to remember this experience; how it made me feel, what it opened my eyes to, and the clarity that I gained from it. Let me preface this post by saying that I have never felt called to do anything like this before, and when I heard the words "psychic" I used to think of an old lady with a crystal ball, surrounded by colourful drapes, vaguely predicting someone's future (spoiler alert - the real thing is nothing like that).
I'll start this blog post off with a little background info about myself, to help you understand my journey and how it ties in to my decision to have an intuitive reading done. A word of caution - this post is gonna be a long one! I have lots to say, so grab a cup of tea, and let's get started.
For as long as I can remember, I have always been a highly sensitive, intuitive person, that had a strong desire to help others. When I was younger, I would try to stifle my emotions, or be "stronger" - I thought that my sensitive nature and high level of self-awareness were weaknesses, not strengths. However, after going through several years of conflict and gaining an appreciation for all the different kinds of human beings in this world, I realized that "fitting in" is no longer one of my goals, and that the happiest, most successful people are those who make use of their unique gifts, and own who they are.
Growing up, I have always been drawn to the more whimsical things in life - for example, fairy lights, crystals, funky jewelry, incense, etc. I also loved things such as music, painting, poetry, and writing, as they resonated with my creative and artistic side. It wasn't until my mid twenties that I started paying attention to these things again - I was off work in 2017 for a year on injury leave, and while it was an extremely difficult and painful experience for me, I chose to use this time to re-explore my relationship with myself.
During this time off work, I went for a lot of different tests and treatments, including chiropractic sessions, intramuscular stimulation (needling), active rehab, physiotherapy, CT scans, MRIs, and massage therapy. During one massage therapy session, my RMT used energetic realignment on me, and I could actually feel the energy she was harnessing and channeling into my body. It was crazy! I knew right then and there that I could no longer ignore the magical "woo woo" things that I was so drawn to, but weren't fully "accepted" or understood by many people in our society. I began to research lots of holistic health treatments, such as acupuncture and cupping, Reiki healing, and herbs and tinctures. I felt so hopeful and connected to everything I was learning about - it was pretty cool.
Fast forward a few months later (spring 2018), and I was feeling a lot of internal conflict - still struggling with pain issues that were being exacerbated by hospital shift work, and feeling such a strong pull to help others in a different way; a way that didn't cause me pain. As you can imagine, this feeling was hard to ignore. At this point, I had been following Chloe Elgar (@chloescountertop) on Instagram for over a year, and she had recently transitioned from working as a holistic nutritionist to a psychic intuitive. Chloe's posts and messages always resonated deeply with me - it was as if she was speaking directly to my own heart, if that makes sense!
I happened to be scrolling through Instagram one night, feeling extremely lost, restless, and hopeless about the future, and what my life was going to be. One of Chloe's posts popped up in my feed, and in that instant, I knew I needed to message her to inquire about a reading. We were able to set something up within a week! Like I said, I had never done anything like this before - I had talked to therapists and psychologists about different issues and struggles in the past, but I still felt like I wanted someone to tap into my energy, and help guide me to living a happier, healthier, more aligned life.
Ok, now you have all the info leading up to my psychic intuitive reading. Let's dive into the actual experience. The night before I was supposed to meet with Chloe, I remember feeling a little nervous, but mostly excited and so interested to see what she would pick up from me. I even had a dream about it, and remember literally being shocked awake by some powerful realization that she had described to me in the dream (I can't recall what it was, but this didn't surprise me in the least - I already knew that I was going to learn a lot from this experience). The next day, we did the reading at Chloe's apartment (for my first session, I felt that it was important to have an in person experience). I was greeted at the door by Chloe and her adorable dog Ollie, and immediately felt comfortable and at ease in her cozy, open apartment.
We started the session off on a very relaxed note, sitting across from each other on the couch, just like you would when chatting with a friend. Chloe had an assortment of crystals and some tarot cards on the table beside us, and what I think was some incense burning, which smelled amazing. I had made a list of questions that I wanted to ask prior to meeting with Chloe, but she was so good about tuning into my energy and guiding me throughout the session that I didn't even need to reference them. I expected to chat mostly about my career and my struggles in that area (chronic pain issues, struggling to keep up with shift work, feeling called to help others but not knowing how I could do so, debt from my car accident), but several other things came up as well - and I'm so glad they did.
I won't take you through the whole reading, as it was over an hour, and this post is already pretty long, but I wanted to mention a few things that I was amazed and inspired by. Firstly, I have to mention that whenever I was talking about something that caused me pain or grief, Chloe's dog Ollie would come and sit in my lap! It was SO sweet - she said he can tell when people need love and support. I was beyond touched by Ollie's protective nature over me. (Side note - dogs are the most amazing creatures. I want one ASAP).
The following are some of the things that we discussed in the reading, which I found so helpful and eye opening:
1. My feelings around perfectionism, failure and rejection, and how these things are holding me back from a lot of experiences that life has to offer
2. The fact that I have an open heart when it comes to helping others, but that I'm extremely guarded and protective of it when it comes to being vulnerable and putting myself in a position to receive love
3. How your parents' life experiences and values/thoughts/beliefs can affect your own, without you even realizing it
4. The importance of human connection - especially love
5. My fears surrounding money and debt, and how they were limiting the abundance in my life
6. How my need to be in control and be happy and light at all times is not realistic, nor a reflection of my true self
7. The positive effects of raising your vibration, and working with energy/removing blocks
8. My feelings about grief and loss, in various aspects of my life
9. The root causes of my stress and anxiety
10. How waiting for the "right time" to do something can hold you back from a lot of powerful and amazing things in life
All in all, this was an incredibly powerful experience for me. Chloe was able to see that I'm already quite intuitive and self-aware, but also knew that sometimes we need our truths to be echoed back to us - that's exactly what I needed, and what happened during our session. So many things that I already felt and knew to be true were confirmed, but also, I learned so much about how sources of discontent/sadness/fear in my body (the "murky waters", as Chloe called them) are affecting different aspects of my life.
I've only scratched the surface when it comes to identifying the inner work I want and need to do, and I'm still working on being vulnerable and open to all the wonderful things that life has to offer. I definitely hope to do more sessions with Chloe, and see how things unfold in my life as I learn more about myself. It's funny - I thought it would take me a few weeks to write this blog post, but all I needed was a couple of hours! The words just came flowing out of me. I'm so glad that I chose to write about this experience - it was very therapeutic, and helped me reflect back on how I felt today. I hope that anyone reading this was able to gain something valuable from it, even if it was just an insight into what psychic intuitive readings are all about.
*Update - I wrote this blog post in April of 2018. It's now nearing the end of August, and I've experienced so many massive shifts in my life since I had my reading with Chloe - I also joined her Vibrate Light Mentorship in June, and can't even begin to describe the incredible journey I've been on over the last few months (I think I sense another blog post coming up soon). If anyone reading this is feeling called to doing inner work/soul work/any sort of healing, I strongly encourage you to follow that intuition. It's not going to be an easy, straightforward journey, but it's so worth it to strengthen your connection with yourself and have a deeper understanding of how your mindset and life experiences can shape your life - after all, you grow through what you go through.
Thank you so much for reading! <3